Thursday 29 September 2011

MILF NO MO'

is anybody surprisedddddd??? how many times can an old pussy (as in vagina) that shit out three (ugly!) kids be rejuvinated back to a place where a hot young rich guy still wants to deal with it (i mean fuck it)...


I dont care how much moolah she's got - milf no mo' sorry Demi, you had a good run though. Ok so in case im getting ahead of myself, here's the poop, Demi and Ashton are dunzo!


How come they never got a weird celebretard hybrid name like dashton or ashi (lol ashi)? whatever no point deliberating now cuz it's over rover.

So apparently good'ol tater nuts was a serial cheater and Demi was tired of pretending she didn't know... or didn't care... or did care?? Who cares! Now he gets to bone the world, she gets to go see Dr. Drew in celeb rehab


(hi i'm Demi, im a ___________) and eventually maybe we'll see her on that "whatever happened to...." show where she'll cry and they'll show pro-cyborg clips of her sculpting with P Swayze (RIP) in ghost.

Tuesday 13 September 2011

dancing with the "stars"

ok so first of all i will be the first to admit that i love bad tv, i love the kardashians more than anything, thursdays are jersdays...but i really dont get dancing with the stars.....lol come on....stars? anyway but aside from the fact that these "stars" wouldn't even make the b-team in the wonderful world of celebretards (sorry rob kardashian i still love you), and ballroom dancing is fucking boring to watch, the big story this year is the fact that tranny chaz bono is a contestant (again...stars????). so naturally all the uptight extremo-christian moms have their panties in a bunch saying that the world should boycot the show (yes, yes they should but not cuz of chaz, cuz it sucks!) - because chaz's presence will be confusing to the children. i would like to point out that looking at chaz is probably the most NOT confusing thing a child could look at.

he is a fat white 40-something year old dude that wears dockers and polos and is as generic as they come...maybe, mom's, if u dont tell her kids that he used to have a vag ur concern for confusion will be avoided. dumb bitches. i would also like to point out that there are far more confusing things that kids are looking at

...lollllll...come on moms, get ur shit together and pick ur battles - he'll probs get kicked off in like 2 seconds anyway.

Wednesday 7 September 2011

toddlers in tiaras...wtf


ok so this show is fucked up, that's a given...spray tanning, bleaching teeth, hair extensions, fake eyelashes/nails...the list goes on and on, the kids are (duh!) toddlers, the moms are psycho and usually (obvi!) ugly and fat (def not phat)... T in T was already screaming child abuse but now child abuse is punching us in the fucking face cuz the screaming didn't get a reaction (RIP North America). I thought it was bad when one of kids was dressed like fucking anna nicole (RIP) or some shit and had fake T&A to turn her into a buxom bombshell (ps she's 3), but the last episode reallllllllllly took the cake, forget the cake, it took all the cakes, all the cakes in the world. one psychostagemomfromhell decided to dress her 3 year old little princess as julia roberts in pretty woman...when she's a prosty at the very beginning of the movie in thigh-high stripper boots and (duh!) a hooker dress....

WOW wtf could have happened in her head to think THAT was a good idea...besides all the moral issues and the infinite layers of wrongness, the movie is from 1990 and all the kids were born like 5 minutes ago...how is julia's character in any way relevent in the context of contemporary baby pagents....i dont get it, im afraid for us, you should be too...real people who live and breathe the same air as us are moms that do this to their kids. OMG :(

Wednesday 17 August 2011

What's the big deal with Justin Bieber? I mean, COME ON!

Ok so this little 15 year old decides to make videos of himself singing other people's songs.. He records so many of them that he ends up getting discovered. Suddenly, in no time, he's the most famous kid on earth, and people praise him as if it's Jesus's second coming! What the hell is wrong with people? There are so many kids out there that have the same or better talent than what Justin Bieber has. I`m sorry Justin, it`s nothing against you, it`s just the ideology towards you that troubles me. I mean all I hear is your name, and i don't even know one of your songs. Just last week i got to see your picture for the first time, and quite frankly I thought you were a girl! I mean look at this picture!


And then I see another picture of you kissing this beautiful girl, Selena Gomez (who is actually talented), and I ask myself "Why Selena, why?". All this to say: What's the big deal with JUSTIN BIEBER PEOPLE? HE'S JUST A BEAVER! And for the fans, I like Selena Gomez better! (don't hate me!) But he can't even lift a couple of pounds! lmao!